Saturday, September 25, 2010

Remaining hopeful

I've had my appointment with the surgeon and October 18 has been set for surgery. I have mixed emotions about it all, but no choices! Actually, the surgeon did give me another choice: to wrap myself in bubble wrap and climb in bed for the rest of my life!

The pain is unpredictable as well as unbearable - there are times when I feel better, kind of forgetting I'm on strong medication - and then there's times the pain is unbearable whether sitting, standing, or laying down, even while taking the medication! I tell myself that these are times to encourage me again that the surgery is very necessary - and if it isn't done as soon as possible, according to the neurosurgeon, I will lose my ability to walk!

My hope comes in knowing that I'll be free of this unbearable pain before the end of the year!
I try not to think about the surgery itself, and the rods and screws they'll attach to the 3 vertebrae to hold them in place while the bones fuse together over the next year or so!

One of my chores presently is cancelling the shows I'd reserved space for the next 3 months. Some of these reservations were expensive - and one of them - a Historical Society, is not willing to refund the $145 I paid for the space! It's hard to believe that someone would deny a refund with 2 months notice! It is a show I've been doing for 10 years- one I have encouraged many vendors as well as customers to participate in!

I've learned from experience however that getting excited or angry over anything, only heightens the pain level! So I guess even pain has something to teach us!

If you have something to share, I'd love to hear about it - maybe we can be encouragement for one another!

the kardlady

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